Another sunny morning, another black coffee and 21 km a day, body aches, muscles tense, and a couple of blisters on my legs, but deep inside I AM happy.
The light is consciousness of the body, either I know myself or experience the world by unconscious reflection creating darkness of sensation over original nervous system. We are unable to detect how the light escapes and polarizes a single consciousness of a spiritual body, but there is no reflection without the mind, hence to identify and observe the thinking process is to know where your emotion runs out and why.
The unconscious self, on one hand creates darkness of sensation inside and on the other reincarnates into physical body. Weakness of original nervous system becomes self-aware only by help of outer sensation and loses true identity. Hence I AM believing to be Gela and so on many lifetimes, until gender persona reunites with unconscious-sensation, supports the light of creation and annihilates duality.
Awareness could not be by itself, it is always awareness of something, enlightenment is self-awareness, the unconscious-sensation reflects and reincarnates by the mind. Either unconscious-emotion polarizes its own body consciousness or reunited field harnesses the self and controls the mind.
I often blame others for giving me bad energy, but never criticize anyone for your experiences, no one could influence strong nervous system against the will, power of outgoing force equals weakness of receptive.